Virtual Oscar Party Highlights

In honor of “The Social Network,” and because I was too lazy to go out or have people over, I hosted an Oscar Party on Facebook.
RR: The Wife: Bleah, ugly dress. Oh, The Wife will be providing fashion commentary tonight.
RR: Harry Osborn and Selina Kyle are trying too hard.
EB: Can we all agree Black Swan deserves no nominations, much less awards?
RR: The Wife: Why doesn’t he put on his glasses?
RR: Commercials already?
RR: Play this woman off already. Isn’t there a time limit anymore?
RR: The Wife isn’t paying attention, so I’ll do the honors: Mila’s outfit is awesome.
RR: YES. I love “The Lost Thing!”
RR: The New Pornographers are selling Kindles!
RR: For the record: The Wife thought Mila’s outfit sucked.
CM: Had enough fun with these Oscars, heading out to the local Ford dealership to watch the cars rust…
RR: Don’t leave now, Clark! They’re doing Best Adapted Screenplay!
SE:  How come they’re playing the music for him and not for the crazy lady who stole Kirk Douglas’ cane?
RR: Not that I’m complaining that they’re trying to play Sorkin off the stage, but why are they harassing everyone but Melissa Leto?
RR: Oh Stevie, we’re of one mind.
RR:  Sorry, it’s Leo. This live blogging is hard.
RR: The Wife loves James Franco’s dress.
RR: Why is Russell Brand on the Academy Awards?
RR: The wife declared Reese’s dress “cute.”
RR: Batman Wins! Lose the beard, Christian.
RR: Apparently the time limit doesn’t apply to Actors.
RR: Oh God, they’re taking time out to tell us ABC is going to continue broadcasting the awards?
SE: I’m quickly losing what little interest I had in the Oscars.
RR: You’re not fascinated by the history of music and sound in motion pictures?
SE: Nope. But Nicole Kidman’s voice is extremely soothing.
RR: ‎”True Grit” didn’t get a Score nomination so I don’t care who wins.
EB:  I’m pissed Haley what’s-her-name from True Grit didn’t win…
LL:  Johansen’s dress is awfully carpet-like…
RR: The Wife cannot get past Scarlett’s hair.
SE: Who cares about Scarlett. Look at Matthew…
RR: The Wife doesn’t like Scarlett’s dress either.
RR: Oh God, Celine Dion. This is why I used to record and fast-foward the Oscars.
LL: Marisa has a vintage dress from the 50s gorgeous! And the hair!
RR: Yes, I love me some Marisa
LL: The queen!
SE: Is she wearing a tablecloth?
RR: The Wife won’t stop complaining about Kate’s outfit.
RR: The Wolfman won an Academy Award. Take that, everyone who hated The Wolfman.
SE: I hate when they read from a paper. Lame.
RR: A written speech? Really? You’d think if she wrote out the speech, she would have timed it.
EB: Seriously, if True Grit loses one more, I’m going to start sending hate mail to the Academy…can’t the RROY Report right this injustice? Defeated by the Beetlejuice director?
RR: The Wife: For a costume designer, you’d think she’d dress better.
EB: Seriously, isn’t there an economic crisis Obama has to attend to? Oscar message?
LL: Eric wonders if Mandy More(?) was still alive… And what a dress, looks like sesame street cupcake
SE: Now I want a cupcake.
RR: The Wife declared the cupcake dress ugly.
EB: Man, people singing with their eyes closed makes great television. Seriously, did they just recycle the Aladdin theme?
RR: I didn’t recognize any of those songs and I saw all those movies.
SE: I’m bored!
RR: Yeah, short subject is dull. But hey, this guy has awesome hair.
LL: Cut ur hair for the Oscars!
RR: how many times is Anne going to change clothes? 
SE: Oh my God. What the f is this?
LL: OMG Amy’s dress!
RR: The Wife hates it too. I’m assuming you hate it.
RR: This is why the Oscars go on forever.
EB: So forgive me for coming late to the party on this, but jesus, the years have not been kind to Ron from Harry Potter, right? Dude looks like he’s got a hell of a drinkng problem for an adolescent…
LL: No, I love it… Oprahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
RR: Does anyone else get the feeling James Franco is stoned?
SE: I really think he is. I normally love him, but he’s sort of freaking me out. And Anne is over compensating.
RR: Billy Crystal gets a standing ovation? That tells you how bad Franco and Hathaway are doing.
EB: Really, when you see how much classier the Brits are than, say, RD Jr, it’s hard to believe we came from them…
KP: Who is doing Anne’s hair so fast? Or are they all hairpieces?
EB: Are Jennifer Hudson’s boobs up for an award or is there some other reason coming out of dress?
RR: I dunno but I like that dress.
SE: I don’t remember this song. Where’s the hot goy from Country Strong? \
SE: I remember it now. It was because she was so off key.
RR: Don’t complain, E-Becks. it’s late enough that something had to be done to keep me awake.
RR: And in a longstanding Oscar tradition, all the Original Song nominees suck.
RR: If Country Strong wins an award, I will throw my shoe through the TV
RR: I love Randy Newman, even if that wasn’t a great song.
RR: The Wife liked Hudson’s dress. Now that was a shocker. Of course, she immediately said she’d never wear something like that.
LL: OMG! Noooooooooooo Celine Noooooooo
SE: I didn’t know that guy died.
EB: Right now, people are angry with themselves for dismantling Cold War- era nuke shelters given that Celine Dion saw fit to make an appearance
RR: Thank you mute button
SE: Or him. Where have I been?
SE: Um, is that plastic?
SE: Okay, I can’t take anymore. And I don’t care any longer. I’m going to bed.  Goodnight.
RR: Too bad Stevie is going to miss the RROY REPORT Virtual Oscar Party After Party. That’s when the fun really begins.
EB: Bridges better win again…
RR: Has Franco moved from that spot all night?
RR: Lord, I hate it when Actors talk about other actors.
MS: What is this RROY Oscar party?!
RR: Where have you been, Shu? Stevie just passed out drunk on the couch.
MS: Typical.
EB: Ok, Natalie Portman, really? I can see the Academy waving as its dignity goes out the window…
RR: Show Natalie some love. She’s in the THOR movie this May.
RR: I wonder which will end first, the awards show or my laptop battery?
RR: The Wife just saw Anne’s latest outfit. “Ewww. It looks like blue foil.”
EB: Dude…seriously…Jeff Bridges better win
RR: Dude, I fear you’re in for a disappointment.
MS:  just as long as it’s not jesse eisenberg.
LL: Mr Darcy!!! Here is a toast to the Brits!
MS:  i didn’t see “the king’s speech,” but i like him in bridget jones.
RR: The Wife is happy. My condolences, E-Becks.
LL: Guys, Eric needs to go to bed… Pardon my hubbs, he’s sleepy.
RR: there’s only 1 more award to go! hang in there!
LL: The Kings Speech!!!! Yay!!!! Love it! Even that True Grit was awesome
EB: True Grit robbed. There’ll be hell to pay. I hold Franco personally responsible- must have mixed up the envelopes in his haze…
RR: oh, thank god they saved the school kids for after the final award. Good night all.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s