Oscar Live Blog Highlights 2014

School closing add a real touch of class to the proceedings. brought to you by John Beal.

Have they done away with the time limit on speeches? It’s going to be a long night.

Well, so we’re off to a great start with a Privileged Hollywood star supporting privileged, corrupt upper middle classers trying to oust the Venezuelan govt…

I saw that movie twice and I don’t remember this song

For the record, they’ve given away 1 award in the first 30 minutes. This really is going to take all night.

I absolute hate this commercial for Cadillac.

Whoever designed Amy Adams costumes for American Hustle deserves an award.

I can’t believe Jackass lost out.

Han Solo continues to be good looking.

If American Hustle did nothing else, it brought back the 10538 Overture.

Who is this woman with Mathew?

The joker’s daughter, I think.

Wow, this is really stretching my patience.

I love Ellen! She is the best! And it’s a pity she didn’t kill Sallie with a joke right now.

Wow, did this year’s films suck so badly that they’re televising all this footage of past movies?

Nah, they always waste time with montages. Wait ’til two hours from now when they bring out the song-and-dance troupe.

That song was shorter than the acceptance speeches.

Wow, look how natural and un-staged this number is–she’s even removed her slippers as if they were outside.

Who stole Larry’s drumset?

Which of the zillion U2 songs that all sound like each other is this one?

Ellen is an acquired taste that I have not acquired.

Why has Liza Minnelli got such a great seat anyway?

Yes, let’s deliver pizza. We’re not running long at all.

Wake me when this is over—this may be the most boring Oscars ever.

Boring? Ellen brought out pizzas for celebrities!

Geez! It’s the Oscars it’s supposed to be this way!

So what’s happening on Walking Dead?

I think tonight is the episode where Darryl dies.

If WD kills Darryl I will stop watching.

Way too much Man of Steel in that montage.

Why? Why must they have some sappy song after In Memorial? They didn’t use to do that.

My computer battery is going to go out before the major awards. Thanks Ellen for all the time sucks.

Why is Kate Blanchett married to such a homely man?

Hey it happens.

You don’t have to tell me.

Chris and Anna’s costume for their Oscar party:

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