Oh, you “Jurassic Park/World” movies. So many stupid, stupid moments. So many cardboard characters. So many action sequences that go far beyond the limits of reason or patience. So many repeated bits. So many plot holes.
But I love them dinosaurs SO MUCH.
“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” is the sixth film in the franchise, and the second since the successful reboot of the series back in 2015. The action quota is high, the logic quota is low, the leads are still charismatic, the dinosaurs are plentiful but don’t get enough screen time.
A volcanic eruption is about to destroy the Central American island of Isla Nublar, home of the former Jurassic World theme park and the cloned dinosaurs that were its major attraction. When the island goes up in flames it will mean the second extinction for dinos.
Trying to head that off is Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard), former theme park manager who is now a dinosaur rights activist. When the U.S. government fails to intervene (although I’m not sure why the U.S. government would have any say in what goes down at a private island in Central America), Dearing is contacted by Benjamin Lockwood (James Cromwell).
Lockwood is the former partner of John Hammond, creator of the original Jurassic Park. Funny how we’ve never heard of this person before now, but he wants to rescue whatever dinosaurs he can and take them to his own private island. To do so, he requires the assistance of Claire and her former boyfriend/co-star from the previous film — dinosaur wrangler Owen Grady (Chris Pratt).
But Lockwood’s business manager, Eli Mills (Rafe Spall), has other plans for the prehistoric creatures.
“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” delivers everything you’ve come to expect from the franchise:
- People making really, really dumb decisions (I think I’ll crawl in bed instead of running away from the dinosaur; I’m going to open this cage with the killer carnivore and try to extract one of his teeth — I’m sure he won’t wake up). I could go on…
- Our heroes being saved at the last minute from a dinosaur by a bigger dinosaur (or a smaller but more aggressive raptor)
- Genetically modified super-dinosaurs. Because real dinosaurs aren’t cool enough
- Cartoonish bad guys eaten by dinosaurs. Good guys surviving so they can cash another check for “Jurassic World 3.”
If you’re good with that, you’ll be good with this.